Lie To Me

I don’t know how many people have heard of Fox’s latest addition, yet alone have seen episodes of it.

 

But I absolutely love it.

 Season 1 premiered in January 2009, and quoting Wikipedia

Lie To Me or Lie to Me* is an American television midseason replacement that premiered on theFox network on January 21, 2009.^[3] The main character, Dr. Cal Lightman (played by Tim Roth), aided by his colleague Dr. Gillian Foster (Kelli Williams), detects deception by observing body language and microexpressions through the Facial Action Coding System, using this talent to assist clients (such as law enforcement).^[3] The character is based on Paul Ekman, notable psychologist and expert on body language and facial expressions. This show is similar to Lifetime’sAngela’s Eyes.^[4]

 

I don’t know about you but this is absolutely beguiling. Reading facial expressions and body language for an hour and deciphering people’s actions (something you can duly pick up and apply in your own environment) just makes talking to people so much more exciting.

Well, I love playing detective so I guess if you do to, hit it a shot.

Of Models and Bridget

To further show I’m an idiot:

Last night I saw 2 towering Ukrainian girls. About 6 feet  plus an extra 3 inches thanks to uber chic shoes. And I had the audacity to ask:

‘Are you girls models’

*smacks self*

I only realise how stupid a question it was until I said it. I mean seriously, 6 feet tall Ukrainian women doing in KL? I cannot get any more stupider than that.

 

Ukrainian model turned actress, Olga Kurylenko ie. the Quantum of Solace Bond Girl

 

 

Stupidity aside, my aunt once told me, ‘You know what, you look like Renee Zelweger.’ 

To which I replied, ‘Oh okay.’

Well I didn’t think about it since then until  one of my sister’s friend mentioned, ‘Your sister looks like Renee.’

And I was like, ‘Woah, okay she’s not the first.’

Then my kind sister added, ‘You actually do. Even I think so too. Oh in case you’re wondering, its Renee in Bridget Jones.’

Yeah the one where she gained a gazillion pounds to star in. Oh dear.

 

I mean wow, look at her cheeks and face. Damn

Oh so one day I casually asked my aunt (when we saw Renee somewhere), ‘So you think I look like her huh?’

‘Yeah, the fat face.’

Yikes.

 

 

Renee as Bridget Jones

 

Le sigh, did anyone say I am a total advocate of plastic surgery? Haha

Over the past 4 months.

My blog is so wordy.

To fix it.

Mango pudding in KL sucks

 

Tiramisu at Alexis. Raved by many, unfortunately not my cup of tea. Perhaps because I don't like toffee/caramel, hence didn't like the top bit. And the bottom bit? Very ordinary.

I miss buying books from Amazon or online shopping for that matter. Argggh!

Yeah, not that pretty, but I had very few resources! And it was quite an impromptu thing, as I completely had no idea what to buy and panicked.

Dim Sum at Concorde. A bit bleargh. I think Chinese food in KL is subpar compared to China/HK. Yeah I know wtf.

Godiva chocolate feels 'cheaper' when paid in Sterling.

Laksa Sarawak at Alexis. After hearing raving reviews about it, I actually went there ALONE to eat it. Only to taste it and went 'Argh, Fazura yours tastes a MILE BETTER.'

And so my sister wanted to surprise her boyfriend with a present that was only available 25.8km away (Google Map told me that) and since we were there she jumped at the salon for a quick cut. Well not really quick, but definitely many many inches shorter than her waist length hair!

 

And so I sat beside her, tempted to chop my locks off as well. But of course resisted the temptation, because every time the exact urge was attended to, hours later would be filled with regret and remorse.

 

 

And so that sums up my last four months. Of course I had a lot more food than that! Some were good, some were substandard. I really just love food, and dining, fine or not. Food, cooking, baking. Hmm, of course appetite comes with mood, I must say.

And thus I have self-proclaimed myself to be a ‘social eater’. Let me explain.

Once in a while, you get some idiots (sorry if you are one, oops!) who tell you they are  ’social smoker’s. I mean seriously wtf is a social smoker, you either do or don’t. I don’t see how you can only occasionally smoke since nicotine is addictive! And to do an activity (such as smoking) for social reasons just makes you soooo stupid because you are just infesting your lungs with tar. There are many more things one could do to socialise, like talk!? How about that? LOL

And then you get the ‘social drinkers’. Which I totally comprehend. Because drinking isn’t as harmful as smoking (in fact red wine is beneficial if taken in moderation!), and to me personally, drinking is a social event. I don’t mix my own gin and tonic, or vodka redbull or pop my own champagne when I’m home alone! Actually the only one time where I had alcohol alone, was when I was once really sad. And the many other times because I just fucking love Baileys in my coffee! Lol. Of course with alcohol, to drink to the point where you end up lying/puking on the streets, thats just stupid.

Then you get the ‘social eater’. And I’m probably the pioneer to the coined term, lol. Only a couple of days ago, I met up with a friend over supper, and despite having just eaten mine, I joined her only because I didn’t want to upset/bore her if she had to eat all by herself whilst I just watch her and sip my tea. And so with a stomach fuller than the moon, I continued to stuff myself.  All because of social reasons! Such a loser. I make myself fat to socialise, okay now I sound like an idiot.

I guess we’re all just stupid in our own ways.

Funny, how the camera is starting to mold in the drawer, perhaps only been brought out at times where I presumed its usage, only to take 2 miserable photos and then be informed by its mechanics that its battery is low.

Then it is chucked into that same drawer again, only this time, battery dead.

I therefore have no pictures to share. Yet I was thinking of purchasing a new camera. Such is the irony of me. One more to my list of idiosyncracies.

Me: I mean seriously, I just want a smart guy. That’s all. A guy who’s smarter than me.

Sister: Yeah sure. They all look like Bill Gates unfortunately.

Me: I just want a guy who’s smarter than me who doesn’t look like Bill Gates.

Sister: Right. You are so going to die alone.

I Like To Swear

One thing I truly miss about Britain is the amount of swearing I’m entitled to. 

And because it’s become such a habit, I sometimes swear outta habit and realise the stares I get. 50 pairs of eyes on me, with a look on their faces that spells ‘what a morally degrading individual.‘

(Okay 50 is a little exaggerated, I was attempting to be dramatic)

Same scenario in Britain, nobody gives two fucks.

I just happen to like to use one of the most versatile words in the English Language. Perhaps it’s a habit I need to kick, talk about being adaptive with society’s norms.

But nothing beats a ‘F*ck You, F*ck Off’ when you’re pissed mad. Amazing retribution that comes with it.

 

 

Pick-up Lines

I for one hate pick-up lines. I think they’re the cheesiest, most obnoxious way of saying hello to a stranger.

I can understand how daunting it is to say hello to a stranger, esp one you find physically appealing or whatever it is that you claim (yeah, right I’m into her personality and all that bullshit, sorry I don’t buy that).

 But ain’t it much easier to just say, ‘Hello, how are you?’ To be honest that’s way less  sexually oppressing and puts you in a lesser position of appearing like a sexual predator. Like really, if someone came to me and said ‘Oh you must be tired. Because you have been running on mind all day’, unless he holds a striking resemblance to any of the following (face and physique):

1. Justin Timberlake
2. Matt Damon (the arms, the arms, the arms)
3. Ryan Reynolds
4. Mark Wahlberg (back in the days of ‘The Big Hit)
5. Leonardo DiCaprio (that German thing really works for me)
6. Ed Westwick (that bloody English accent does the trick)

then he is bout to get an answer that goes ‘Perhaps. But who cares? I ain’t running in that piece of dung ever again’. 

Oops, pretty harsh.

So a couple of weeks back, I had the stupidest line thrown at me.

“So where is your boyfriend?” When it was clearly obvious that I wasn’t clinging to any boy in sight the entire night.

“HUH?”

“You know, your boyfriend?”

“Errrr. I’m not actually seeing anyone. “

“Oh really? I thought you have a boyfriend.”

“HUH?”

“You know, you just look like you have one.”

Jaw gapes. That was such a bad, such a bad cover-up. Subtlety failed I’d say. Honestly I’d prefer a much forward approach.

I was in a coffee shop reading.

Ugly man walks up to me.

“Hello, are you Japanese?”

“HUH?”

“Oh no, I saw you eating Pocky sticks.”  Like seriously wtf  if I eat chips then I am English?

“Errrr.. no. I’m Chinese”

After a couple of attempted lines of conversation in the lines of what are you doing here, what are you reading of about 2 minutes, he blatantly asked,

“Do you have a boyfriend?”

To which I said yes, and not only did he not walk away, but proceeded to ask me where is he from, what does he do, how did we meet like seriously WTF! None of your freaking business.

I seriously have many encounters with strangers. Many of which end up with me talking about the economy, hairstyles, makeup, food, there was even one where a lady went on to show me the suspenders she bought (I know!), but the strangest of all encounters with strangers, was two married men telling me about their infidelities. LIKE I KNOW WTF. 

I guess I’m just too go-with-the-flow.

I mean I know the British are polite, but this is seriously funny.

More British passengers died on the Titanic because they queued politely for lifeboats, researchers believe.

Funny as in hilarious, not funny like how the American’s say funny to mean odd.

You can read on if it pushes you buttons.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/americas/7843154.stm

P/s: trying to live on a 512kbps internet connection is worse than primitive, it’s almost like being reincarnated as a moth.

19 days on

19 days on after the new year, and my list of accomplishment includes:

- dishwashing

- more dishwashing

- cleaning

- scrubbing

- more cleaning

 

I seriously didn’t know housekeeping was a full-time job. Anyone out there looking for a part-time cleaner? Or perhaps a more glamorous name to it – housekeeper?

 

I am available for duty weekends. Price is negotiable, but nothing below minimum wage.

Happy 2009

I commemorated the new year by spilling boiling soup over my right palm, thereby ushering the new year with some good scalding.

Happy 2009.

Rarely do I go out to celebrate a new year, in fact rarely do I celebrate much. I’m not exactly hooray its newyear/mybirthday/yourbirthday/ananniversary. I’m boring like that. Perhaps I’ve always been a little precocious, and today any celebration for me is good food,  good wine and good music. And of course good company.

2008 was a tough year for me. I spent half the year pondering what to do with my life, half the time trying to mend the broken pieces. It’s also the year of many firsts, many of which were against my conscience, but am glad I finally crawled out of that which was inhibiting my every move. It’s finally over, that chapter of my life I was so eager to close. 

But yet, I still haven’t found a beginning to a new one.

Perhaps Matt Damon just needs to knock on my door and we can go a discovery journey hand in hand. Yes I find him irresistibly hot to the point of scalding. I don’t mind if it’s him scalding my entire body if it means boning the sexiest man alive.  I look forward to the day, if not 2009 then 2090 when I shall be old enough to actually be a bone myself. (Yes, I’m attempting a joke here)

I found a ridiculous picture of myself. Just you know, something visual to usher the new year. That shall be the ad hoc stimulant for the mean time, until Matt Damon comes knocking on my door.

AH, heck I do realise he doesn't look like this anymore, but bloody hell he's so boy next door. Fuckin sexy.

My mom says he's not hot and he looks like DiCaprio. Reason: She thinks these 2 stars look like schoolboys.

Awwww, I can totally picture coming home to him propped on the couch. Shit. Alright, last picture of him before my weblog turns into some Matt Damon appreciation society log..

 

And if you haven’t seen Damon’s masterpiece ie. The Bourne Identity/Supremacy/Ultimatum, on top of Good Will Hunting then you haven’t seen some good shit.